Favorite Time of the Year

I adore the feeling I get in the pit of my tummy during the holidays. I look forward to lots of family time. Add my new baby girl and it is even more perfect!!
Favorite things during this season in no particular order...
Chilly days
Searching for the perfect gift
Singing Christmas Carols
Looking at Christmas lights
Being in the middle of the Christmas Shopping rush
The stranger who waited in the cold to open the door
The cashier who seemed genuine in wishing me a Merry Christmas
Opening Christmas cards from loved ones
The Facebook photos of friends enjoying the Holiday
Unexpected visits from traveling family members
The look of complete gratitude and excitement on Gabes face
The Christmas morning "I love yous" and "Thank yous"
Watching the snow fall (wait did I mention we had a white Christmas...in TEXAS!!)
The looks of chaos after presents are unwrapped
Remembering it all started with a baby

Nothing like holiday movies to get into the spirit! I'm not gonna lie watching a little crazy in other families is quite soothing. We watched Home Alone. The Family Stone and Love Actually We made chocolate chip muffins which turned out delicious! We held onto each other and loved one another like there's no tomorrow. We had a blast visiting with family and celebrating Jillian's first Christmas.
I hope you and yours had an amazing holiday. As for me it was blissful :)   I can't wait to start printing all the memories I was able to capture. Most of them will forever remain in memory. All of these memories remind me how truly blessed I am.

 Aunt Jan and baby Jillian

How wonderful it is that great granny has the strength to hold sweet baby girl. 

This is one of the only photos I was in this Christmas..sigh..next holiday I will remember 

 Poor Gabe opened his presents and then went straight to sleep...It turns out he had the flu

Wishing ya'll the very best this holiday!

Let's Talk About Liquid Gold

When I became a mom for the first time, breastfeeding was no easy feat. For those of you who have yet to breastfeed but are considering it...I will give it to you straight. Keep in mind everyone is different and this is my own personal experience. No one advised me how hard it could be for a baby to latch on..that your boobs would inflate to the size of your head...nipples crack and bleed. I'm sure I would have reconsidered, if I had heard. Basically I didn't know what I was getting into. People were quick to tell me it was normal...thanks for the warning!! Gabe had a hard time latching on when I got home from the hospital. I felt completely useless...I felt like a horrible mom for not being able to breastfeed successfully. After a lot of encouragement we tried again and we did it! A secret...for those of you who did not breastfeed I am a little jealous. Whatever you choose, I'm sure it is what was best for your family.

I prepared myself this time around. I researched and read as much as I could before the big day. When Jillian came she did latch on right away. My girl was hungry! I chose skin to skin contact time after delivery. Some mothers are not able to experience this due to the trauma of labor and I was extremely grateful. I packed my boppy to the hospital and left it in the car. My arms were exhausted and it would have been amazing to have something to rest them on while I nursed. I LOVE my boppy. (Shout out for the great baby shower gift Jenni and Ashley!) If you do not have one and plan on breastfeeding...go get one now! 

For the first few days baby had colostrum. Her pediatrician asked if my milk had come in and I said I didn't think so. He laughed and said "Oh you would know". The next day my boobs blew up  and ached with every touch. Add a hungry baby in the mix and my hormones were everywhere. I pumped to help empty them out. Some people say not to but it helped me. Yes, it was very painful that first time to pump. Lansinoh Soothie Gel pads felt amazing during this time. I would at least get one package because the pain is really only a few days. Don't get scared though..It can be done!

I used the lansinoh breast pads and they do the job! They have sticky tabs on the backside to stay in place in your bra. I don't know how many times I had to change my shirt due to leaking those first few weeks. I read somewhere that a nursing sleep bra would come in handy. Boy were they right! In fact that's all I wear still unless I am going out of the house. I need the girls to stay in place. Those first few weeks this type of bra helped to be comfy when your chest is in pain and it was overall very convenient. I suggest setting up an area where you breastfeed. Make sure you have a nightlight...snacks...water..a burp cloth. You should see my night stand...it is a mess of stuff I use. 

Pumping has become just another part of my day. I have the Medela Harmony manual pump. I never used an electric pump and to be honest I was scared it would hurt. I wanted to be in charge of the flow as much as possible. When I breastfed Gabe, I used the Avent manual pump and it would always fall apart. I absolutely adore my breast pump. It's comfortable...easy to use...easy to clean...and has not broken! The breast pump also fits on my Dr. Brown bottles. How convenient is that?? 

I am going back to work in January and have started storing what I pump. I was doing pretty well until last week. I was only able to pump maybe an ounce a day! I also started noticing what I think to be a lower supply in the evenings. I looked up ways to increase my supply and talked to my lactation consultant friend. I need to be able to pump a lot more when I go back to work. Trying Ovaltine and dark beer were a few suggestions. I heard about milk maker cookies on a blog. The reviews were 100% positive. I figured it was worth a try. I have only been eating them a few days. They are surprisingly tasty! Already my boobs look and feel more full. I have also been able to pump twice as much as I had been. These cookies are well worth it :-)

Yes breastfeeding is not always easy. I wouldn't have done it any other way. Knowing I am able to sustain my precious baby and see her belly round out feels like an amazing accomplishment. The bond we have shared is irreplaceable.  

Thanks for stopping by! I hope this post was helpful 

A Journey of Love

They say every pregnancy/birth is different. I know now firsthand how very true this is. I had a fairly easy first pregnancy. I was nauseous up to my 7th month, nothing helped! However, I was not scared at all. I gained a scary amount of weight but it didn't bother me at the time. My mucous plug fell a week before Gabriel's arrival while I happen to be at Babies R US. Exactly a week later my water broke! That is when it got a little scary. In fact there is a photo somewhere taken within minutes of my water breaking and I look petrified.
When I was given the epidural I jumped a little...making the doc pissed off at me. Hey that thing hurt more than people let on! After 15 hours I was ready to push. I remember this clearly because my epidural wore off by 9 cm and I was feeling everything! What was the pain like? Well someone asked me a few hours later and I answered with..it felt like someone stabbing you from the inside or being hit by a train. After two very long hours of pushing, I became a mama.
That's when everything became a little blurry. I remember nurses rushing around and someone telling Henry, if I passed out I may not come to. I had a fever and things weren't looking so good. After a week long stint in the hospital we made it!
My dreams were coming true! After I had Gabe, I decided that I wanted more than anything to stay home with my kids one day. I also wanted to be able to grow old and have a house full of grandchildren. Holidays would be completely blissful with all the chaos and noise! I never thought for a moment this wouldn't come true.
8 years later I was diagnosed with SLE, a form of Lupus. My doctor told me if I wanted to have more kids, I should get on it. However I had to be in remission for the best outcome. The odds of me carrying to term or having a successful pregnancy were not good at this point. I tried coming to terms with possibly not having more kids. I had not been in remission since I was diagnosed.
In March of 2012, I took a pregnancy test. I was only a few days late but I hadn't been feeling good. Did I mention I was pretty paranoid and took tests like every other month? This test came out different than the rest. Not sure of what it meant, I reread the box...it was POSITIVE! I was shocked/excited/scared all at the same time. When I went to the doctor, she assured me I was in fact in remission. We were both healthy and progressing well.

I knew it would be difficult telling Gabe. I tried putting it off till I started showing. He had been my only for 10 years after all. I tried hinting here and there. He was not having it. I made the mistake of telling him in the car while I was driving. Let's just say he tried removing himself from the moving vehicle. He may be a little dramatic (probably got that from his dad ;)) but he means the world to me. He did not like discussing the baby throughout the pregnancy and I was a little worried for when she was actually here.
My pregnancy was a little different this time. I had a few injections and infusions but baby girl was healthy throughout. Every day I was scared. Every day I prayed. This little unexpected miracle had to be healthy. I was so scared that something would happen. My doctor tried preparing me for possible outcomes after birth.

On October 17 our world was changed forever. We welcomed our beautiful baby girl. As you may have read in my first post, my labor and delivery was nothing like my first. We were both healthy and were released the very next day. Brother could not be more happy! In fact he offered to help as much as he can. I can't tell you how full my heart is. I have been blessed more than I can ever imagine. This is a dream come true :-)